How Come.....

I know what I need to stay away from? But I can't seem to stay away from it. There is this monster inside me wanting to get out and it needs to stay out. Everyday is a new day I need to teach myself to become a better person and stay away from that monster that is turning me into this disaster that I am not. As I was growing up I had problems every normal human being does, how come it seems to be getting worst? How come? How come? I need to stay away from the monster.