Late Night

For me late night is the time I free my mind from all my problems and it is also the time I cannot seem to stop thinking about this person. Yesterday I went throught this trauma finding out the guy I thought who was my everything, my life, my rock, and I could continue to go on although he tore me, wrecked me, shot my insides, made me lose my mind, just when you think you know somebody so well it will never be enough. I spent four entire years of my life moving on each day loving this person, thinking about them, and basing my life upon this person. To come and find out he is this insane beast who lost control of himself. The term "Men are all the same," I began to overlook because I thought this beast was the one. I discovered things that no girl would ever want to face. Cheating on a person is bad enough, sure actions are tough. Words are the ones that stick and fry into your brain and will scar your heart for life. Thanks alot.

How Come.....

I know what I need to stay away from? But I can't seem to stay away from it. There is this monster inside me wanting to get out and it needs to stay out. Everyday is a new day I need to teach myself to become a better person and stay away from that monster that is turning me into this disaster that I am not. As I was growing up I had problems every normal human being does, how come it seems to be getting worst? How come? How come? I need to stay away from the monster.

Listen

When no one listens..... It goes through one ear out the other. Does that feeling suck? More than ever.

Boy

Girls need to just keep their mind open to the fact that he's just another boy. Why must a girl suffer for a boy? Being in love may be the most important thing in the world right now, although it isn't. Going through hardhships isn't exactly easy. It's unfortunate to say that once you find a boy you think you've given your heart and everything to, do not ever give it all, cause in the end they'll just rip you heart in two. Finding a boy that will actually make you proud for being a girl is very uncommon now. Each day I realize the world is becoming so shitty, people are shady, girls are becoming sluttier, boys don't know how to keep their valuables away, people surronding us drinking and smoking and all these things are a part of everyday life. It's a disgrace to see what a girl puts herself through thinking this one boy was the one. It's so easy for a boy to make a girl cry why should it be that way? Why can't it be the reverse? Cause' guess what boys have no respect for themselves, it's most likely because they have no self-esteem that they will go beyond the point to hurt that poor innocent girl that stood by them 24/7 over this shitty world that is being created. Boys tell you how much they love you and no other girl in this world is worth it that's why they spend half their life with you, yet when they get that open opportunity it is so easy for them to erase everything they've said, trusting a boy is what i'll try and avoid each day of my life, because i've fallen once and if I fall twice I might just be as stupid as that boy I keep crawling to.

Smile

Smile, it's a thing I try to do each day it's getting harder actually. Being different is so hard nobody seems to like you. I want to find a person in this world who is just like me how come being different has become such a bad trait to have these days?

People

Always seem to disappoint me.

Happiness

Lately happiness is definitely hard for me to find and also define. At times I feel as if I have found it, although something always makes me think twice about ir I always seem to find myself worrying too much and overwhelmed about a situation that is not even infront of me. It has been so hard to find somebody I could relate with.

One of the best songs written

I can honestly say you've been on my mind
Since I woke up today, up todayI look at your photograph all the time
These memories come back to life
And I don't mindI remember when we kissedI still feel it on my lips
The time that you danced with me
With no music playing
But I remember those simple things
I remember 'til I cryBut the one thing I wish I'd forget
The memory I wanna forgetIs goodbye
I woke up this morning and played are song
And throwing my tears, I sang alongI picked up the phone and then put it down'
Cause I know I'm wasting my timeAnd I don't mindI remember when we kissedI still feel it on my lips
The time that you danced with meWith no music playing
But I remember the simple things
I remember 'til I cryBut the one thing I wish I'd forget
The memory I wanna forgetSuddenly my cell phone's blowing upWith your ringtone
I hesitate but answer it anyway
You sound so alone
And I'm surprised to hear you say
You remember when we kissedYou still feel it on your lips
The time that you danced with meWith no music playing
You remember the simple thingsWe talked 'til we criedYou said that your biggest regret
The one thing you wish I'd forgetIs saying goodbye, saying goodbye
Ooh, goodbye

By: Miley Cyrus

Emotions

Expressing your emotions to another person you care for or maybe even like isn't always easy. It isn't as easy as if simply saying "yes" or "no." If you only knew how much I actually have to say it would be as if writing a billion word essay and how many times I could say FUCK YOU. Falling in and out of love is extremely tough but truthfully it is life, although sometimes you want to spill your emotion and anger to that other but you cannot seem to find the strength to. Times like this is when you want to tear that person and half and kick them to the point that they cannot get up. Emotions......

Foolish

I am tired of being a foolish person I always seem to bury myself in a big hole each day. It's time that I am going to dig myself out of it for good.

It's never easy....

saying goodbye.

Feeling Alright

I guess you could say I woke up this morning feeling alright, look on the brightside I still have the people I love around me. I awoke to my beautiful Louie greeting me goodmorning that immediately brighten my day. Last night I was concerned about my friends hearing bad news, although you know what I will not let unecessary problems ruin my life anymore I am going to learn to say goodbye.

True Friend

I have no such thing.

Lovely

Sometimes I catch myself daze off just staring at objects around me. I realize how blessed Iam to have my family. Each day I sit on a rock and look at the view of our pool and just think about how lovely everything is around me.

Spirits

Somedays all I could think is losing a loved one I think to myself everyday my attitude has become so shitty. As a person I want to change to become better. I want to treat those who I care of the most as if I am offering my soul to them. This past year it feels that I need an awakening, my mind is spinning round and round I pray to God to help me out.

Palpitate

Stories, love, unfortunate events, hatred, gossip, family all of these things we deal with everyday we breath. This past year I get this feeling I cannot explain. It is as if you want the entire world to fall on you. I guess you could say I fell in love, like they've always said, "First Cut is the Deepest," although I never actually thought I would ever have to feel that. I am going to be straight-forward now I am not going to be your average write where they try and watch their grammar and how you could make things sound good I am stating the way I see things. Yes, i've been completely heartbroken these past months it is funny how a guy could actually hurt you so badly as a matter of fact. To think about what he has put me through I constantly get PALPITATION. I went through this emotional break-up a few months ago what absoloutely blows the most is when you trust this guy for four years, and three weeks later this bastard has a girlfriend. Your insides just blow up right there and then. Finding out a new girl was hard enough finding out news was quite tough as well, but what hurt the most is realizing the person you were in love with, is in love with somebody else, yeah I was crushed. I did things that I should not have done when I found out, although I felt it was the only thing I could do to keep my mom on off of him. I began partying, running into deadbeats, and getting into unreasonable trouble. I woke up now realizing I am not your typical average girl I am not like everyone else something about me is actually different. As the days went on I realize who my true friends actually are, sadly I have nobody left, it came to show I did not have a true friend, the people who I thought were are as usual out looking for "WHAT'S GOING DOWN TONIGHT PEOPLE." Well you know what peace to you guys as well I am a strong person and I will manage to live.

Every Other Day

I live in this town, Simi Valley, where I seem to be surronded by deadbeats it is unfortunate that I have to state people in that matter although I have no other way in explaining how people are out here. I guess you could say everything bothers me, I haven't figured out why people find our town so appealing, majority of individuals that grow up here most likely live their sads lives here forever. I have become this angry person I am not because I have came to realize how shitty everything around me actually is. I am an intelligent person now I am just waiting for others around me to pull themselves together.